Wiolin April 16th, 2012
About a year ago I woke from a nightmare all tense and saying “No, NOOO!!” From my dream journal on Tuesday, March 15, 2011:
Someone was operating on me – against my will – quite Hannibal Lecterish. They had sliced my abdomen open and were trying to pull out my “intestine”. The incision was (from my perspective) just a little below my ribcage, just a little left of center. The “intestine” was actually like the ribbon tape from the inside of a computer, or a bandage – it had been placed there before, it wasn’t human tissue. But I didn’t want it removed.
This was a nightmare type of dream as I kept saying “no, no” and was really fearful and really didn’t want them to take it out. It was one guy, not sure who it was, and he had an assistant.
Earlier there was something about a violin, I wanted to learn to play. It was the same violin my dad had in my youth, with a string missing.
In real life when I woke up: I feel like I would like to play the violin. I love the haunting sound.
I didn’t re-read these words for about a year, although the “No, NOOO!!” part and the vision of the ribbon tape bandage being pulled out of me remained. Recalling that I had a cold and ate chili 2 nights in a row before the nightmare, I tried several times having chili doubles with hopes of creating a similar experience, but to no avail. Even when I was again sick, I could bring forth no sequel.
(Why would I want to relive a nightmare? Morbid curiosity, wanting to get more clues on what it means, and I have always had a thing for horror movies… Why not?)
A year later, I found myself reminded of this dream by some current events: I had another dream of being stalked by the Terminator, followed closely by my involvement in an event called Cyber Glitz and also hearing a friend had to have his appendix out. Then words from a song a few weeks ago pushed me a step further to looking back into my dream diary.
I had forgotten the part about the violin, but now that started tugging at me, and I became consciously aware of any mention of the instrument. Then the day before yesterday a friend-I’ve-never-met of a friend-I’ve-never-met of a friend-I’ve-never-met of a cousin* shared a YouTube link of someone playing. A trivial thing, but it was the last straw.
So yesterday I said, “why not look on Craigslist and see if there are any used violins for sale?” There was one in Arvada. Cool, that’s not too far away. I feel an urge to go for it. So I did. I called, and arranged to meet the gal selling it shortly after 4. At this time both of our understandings were that it was in good condition, just needed rosin for the bow.
On my way over there the gal calls me to tell me she’s sorry but she found there’s a string missing. She thinks her little brother was a bit rough with it. Wonders if I’d still want it. “That’s actually perfect,” I reply, saying I’ll explain more when I get there. The missing string wasn’t the same one as on my Dad’s (iirc) but nonetheless… I did manage to wrangle a sizable discount on said violin, enough to cover most of the cost of a new string, rosin and a lesson book.
So far, the only sounds I can get to emanate from this wooden and wire contraption are comically frightening instead of haunting like I intended. The damn strings are too close together and my bowing sucks. (I’m a Baumann, not a Bowman.) But, I’m only on page 8 and I’m still young… I mean, this little kid learned piano and is only 2 years old! If she can do that, what can’t I do?!?
* I HIGHLY recommend friending friends of friends or relatives that you don’t know but feel a certain connection with based on the things they say or do. This particular chain of friends is quite interesting to me and the only one of its kind among my Facebook friends.
